Tiny Based, not Huge Ma

Based, broski.

So is the role of original Open New York candidate, Justin Potter, now being played by you, TurboRelaxed?

You must remember Justin Potter, right? He was that 2019 pro-Amazon yimbot wallflower senatorial seat “hopeful😤🍼😫” who had barely campaigned in Queens District 12 before handing his efforts over to former garbage manager Iggy Terranova who ran the anti-Mike-Gianaris race into a Black Lives Matter brick wall.

You’re a Justin Potter, Huge.

You never met with anyone in your district. I mean, as you know better than I, people did reach out to you to talk, to network, to try and get more information from you about your platform and your responses to them were tepid at best and dismissive and condescending at worst.

We all can appreciate the yimby slack chat (that tiny, self-congratulatory, downzoned bubble of testosterone-deluded non-reality) may have dirt-soil-sprouted a microscopic hard-on for you but in what was your district, the district which is right next to mine, voters remained fantastically unimpressed by your arrogance, your stiltedness, your coldness and your lack of public service experience.

And your need to take a thwack at me as you exit your joke of a campaign (but way to pocket a hundo thou, dude: spice-o-riffic take and totalmundo “based, king😤🍼😩”) merely confirms that you are just as mediocre and unexceptional as the homogeneous group of bros which spawned you, Open New York.

So, your early escape out of a campaign where you did almost nothing is no surprise to me.

And you could have still run, Huge: during a redistricting cycle, you don’t have to even live in the district to run for its assembly seat.

So why didn’t you?

Why not just run?

You had collected so much money in donations.

You had the savior brand of TurboVax under your belt.

You could have won, regardless of the redistricting: you could have won.

If you had tried, even a little bit.

But you didn’t.

Where you put your effort, instead, was making a joke about me: that’s where you “try,” Huge. And that effort, your small parting shart to me, of all constituents and voters, of all real, loud and vocal Queens residents, shows who you are and reveals your ever-present sense of self-entitlement and your inherent laziness.

So what are you going to do with the $100K you raised? You should return that money to your donors: it’s like you tricked them by taking funds from them in the first place, given how quickly you just gave up on your race.

And it’s not like you need that $100K in donor money, TechBoi: do the right thing and give it back.

So good riddance, Small Flaw: thanks for making all of this even more easy for the people who see right through the yimby bullshit and the snarky obvious Open New York propaganda. Thank you for making us voters right, again and as always.

And I don’t need you to #freefuelgrannie: you’re too inactive, too reticent, too timid. You’re of no use to me, booboo.

I got this.

Stop being me, IP address 160.72.72.58
Huge lazy

“just say f*gs Connie this is taking forever😤🍼😩”

Yeah, gosh so, it *is* “taking forever,” Nick Tagliaferro, because that’s a word I just don’t say: I do not use that slur.

I never have.

Which you already know I don’t do as my possibly uttering it is, to you, “taking forever.”

Weird flex that it looks like the hard reality of me never using the slur “f*gs” angers and frustrates you.

Why?

Why is that?

Why were you goading me to say a slur I never say and never use? No one should say or use that slur.

So then why were you so impatient about my never using it? Did you want me to say that slur? Is that why it was “taking forever” for you? Is that why you were so bothered?

Because isn’t it, in fact, a good thing that I don’t say “f*gs?”

Isn’t not saying “f*gs” kinda the goal on this planet?

You’re literally proving that I don’t use this language.

You’re also showing how invested you are in the false and strange hope that I would use this slur which combines with your telling disappointment and vexation that I don’t use it.

I see you, yimby: and my seeing you never “takes forever.”

I see your lie, I see your irrational consternation, I see your dishonesty, I see your agenda, I see your hand and I see that you are wrong.

I see you, yimby👋

#FreeFuelGrannie’s Screenshots, Aaron Carr

Which is it, Aaron Carr?

Because Twitter would like to know, too.

Is it “over a hundred” screenshots you have of my alleged homophobic racist behavior?

Or is it just those three old tired screenshots you keep hauling out as some deep, repeated and proven evidence of my consistent and thickly bigoted behavior?

Because there is no seething hatefulness or prejudice in any of those screenshots, including that one single tweet of mine, the one which you keep deploying as concrete, definitive demonstration of my raging homophobia: that tweet, which is now hidden due to the suspension of my account, describes “twinks + bears = yimby force.” This tweet is shady as all hell, it’s flat out rude, for sure, but it’s not, by any definition, hateful.

The overwhelming optics of yimby show young, white men, many with beards, many with glasses: Zach Galifianakis and Where’s Waldo.

If you’re going to refer to your opponents as the lead paint caucus, then we’re going to refer to you as twinks and bears.

Which I only did that one time, Aaron.

And which I had acknowledged had offended you (an acknowledgment you yourself had even liked👇) yet you have always, conveniently, omitted this tweet’s existence. You pretend it never happened.

So I have a screenshot, too.

I tweeted out the below apology to you (after hours and hours of enduring a typical endless Aaron A. Carrversation) where you had called me a “con,” a liar who habitually deletes her tweets and a racist, despite not having brought with you even one receipt to demonstrate any truth to any of these accusations.

I have a screenshot, too, Aaron👋

In fact, you had defiantly refused to produce any evidence, as if substantiating your indictment against me was somehow beneath you.

The only “proof” you were able to provide (which was curiously not in reference to me being a con or a liar or a deleter of tweets or a racist) finally arrived at 12:22am, almost six hours after you had initially accused me of being a “con” at 6:41pm: it was just that one “yimby force” tweet, via a screenshot of a purposefully unlinked tweet.

And I suspect the photograph of that tweet was, in fact, not on your phone as a screenshot, as you had teased yet never delivered, but rather was texted or dm-ed to you as our 6-hour marathon dialogue dragged on.

This all raises suspicion.

You had made so many claims, declaring you had screenshots (now a familiar yet empty refrain from you) but the sole substantiation of it all was just one single screenshot, not the “many” tweets you had hissed about having.

And that one single screenshot was finally produced many hours into our conversation.

Why didn’t you provide that allegedly damning screenshot much earlier in the conversation? Why did it take you six entire hours to finally cough it up?

And why have you never supplied any other screenshots? You had alleged taking screenshots of my feed that very day, just about a year ago, January 27, 2021, but the screenshot you provided was from two months earlier, from mid-November 2020.

Odd.

You now claim that you have over a hundred of screenshots of me acting all racisty and homophoby and hatery in general: so, where are they, Aaron?

Where are those screenshots, Aaron?

They would add context to that one screenshot, wouldn’t they?

And I gave you that apology, almost immediately, which resulted in you blocking me, likely because you were caught. You got what you hadn’t expected to get from me, something the rest of us never get from you: accountability.

The fact that you yourself liked my apology also strongly implies you read the tweet: liking is an acknowledgment. But then you immediately blocked me, within seconds. You then blocked me via your Housing Rights Initiative account: I screenshot both of your blocks and tweeted them out.

Your action of using your HRI account to block me (and thus evade any confrontation) is just one reason why I block people who work for you at HRI: I don’t trust you, I don’t trust New Leaders Council, I don’t trust your yimby organization and I don’t trust the people you pay. That also includes the politicians you give money to: following your money is always an eye opening tell.

You wasted 6 hours, Aaron, accusing me of things you literally could not prove and then you blocked me on your two separate accounts for taking responsibility for the one sole offense you were able to produce.

What do you think that looks like, Aaron?

What do you think you look like?

Because you lie all the time.

You lied about me and the existence of all those screenshots (I mean, unless you have them: it’s ok, we’ll wait).

You lie about Manhattan being 30% landmarked when in reality “historic districts cover less than 4% of the lots and lot area in” NYC.

You also lied about the SoHo NoHo rezoning creating “700+ units of affordable housing at $900 a month for a family of 3.”

In fact, that fantasy has turned out to be a huge lie, and was likely bandied about in a lobbying effort to city council members as concrete truth so to sway the vote for the SoHo NoHo rezoning, and you told it many, many, many times.

So are you also lying about those 97 other screenshots you supposedly possess which can better document my racism, my bigotry, my homophobia, my hatefulness and my violence?

I mean, if you still have those screenshots, that is, as I know how much my content fully annoys you and remains beneath you to even research. But, just in the case that you might still have those scores of screenshots of my behavior, I reckon Twitter would want to see them, too, as I move forward with my appeal.

You’re selling “free fuel grannie” t shirts: the rest of us just want you to free the fuelgrannie screenshots.

“dozens ~*upon*~ dozens of screenshots!!!!!!!!😤🍼😫” (k guess we’ll wait for those, A-Plod)

It’s telling that you post this screenshot, Aaron, but you have yet to post all those (“like a hundred!!!!!😤🍼😫”) screenshots of alleged homophobia, racism, violence and hate which you claim to have. When will you post those? Or are you just lying?


Aaron: I have dozens upon dozens of screenshots, like, well, like a hundred of them!!!!!!😤🍼😫

Everyone else: k post them

Aaron: um let’s look at this tornado instead!!!😤🍼😫
(🙊)
Aaron’s notorious misplaced anger (“😤🍼😫”)
Oh look

It’s a screenshot of my tweet about how stressful moving homes is for old people

Huh

I keep wondering where all those “homophobic screenshots😤🍼😫” are cause this one still ain’t it, either

🤷‍♀️

The HandGrannie’s Tale

Oh, so it isn’t just me making eldercide jokes at my own expense.

Even all the way over in Canada, my role is now being played by Margaret Atwood.

Taking it to “fuelgrannie level,” the author of *cough* The Handmaid’s Tale is no newby to housing debate as she calls out the frosty and inhumane yimby take on old people daring to stay alive and thus occupying the very homes the yimbys would like to live in, now, thank you very much.

Aging in place is perceived as selfish: old people demonstrating the sheer arrogant audacity of staying in their own homes and not moving out so to meet the immediate whims of impatient, apartment-hopping tech bros are seen as “an absolutely massive public policy problem.”

Unsurprisingly, Atwood’s impertinent “boomering” was met with the usual twisty yimby arguments for their proponents to lose their homes or, at least, for their lives to end. Because old people, “nimbzombies,” don’t belong in “housing discourse these days” as their “feelings are bad ones.”

And any old people who are afraid of inevitable displacement are ackshually racists: those saggy segregationists, in fact, deserve to lose their homes.

Let’s bomb them. C’mon it’s funny.

Despite having literally made my own self the butt of such a joke, I was nonetheless suspended for sarcasm about old people being killed.

I had tweeted almost the same thing as Margaret Atwood.

Because despite the fact that she and I live in completely different cities, we both well know the ways and words of yimbys.

I mean, we all do, don’t we, at this point?

We all know too the deliberate twisting of words, the crybabying victimhood and the pouting tantrums of yimby: “😤,” “🍼” and “😩.” I couldn’t have answered better myself.

Margaret Atwood spells out the “😤,” “🍼,” and “😩”

You have their number, Peg: keep haunting them.

Victory Yap

Shake off your black veil and grab that baby bottle, kids: we have a funeral to attend.

Fuelgrannie is dead.

Ok, maybe not in real life, but I have croaked on Twitter which just might be better than passing away in real life, which Twitter isn’t, amirite?

Ding dong that witch is dead: RIP to a real one.

Emilia Defraudin apparently has died from joy.

Rebel with Good Cause Aaron Carr is selling #freefuelgrannie t-shirts.

Ceiling-gazer Meeeeelar puts me in a league of my own: save a seat in the front row for him, pweeeese.

Ben Wetz, however, is muting both the fuelgrannie funeral and any of its related keywords: SpiderYim is already over this particular trip to six feet under.

But Ben Wetz is amplifying me as he tweets about muting me.

Which presents the conundrum of the yimby victory lap: as they all howl for their opponents to just take the L, yimbys draw almost too much attention, sometimes even inadvertently positive, to their enemies, while also revealing their own bloodthirst for overkill.

Dresden, anyone?

The gloating may go over well in their limited bubble, but even a dead person like me can see the optics and downside of such off-putting bragging. The victory lap can bring its own backlash.

Yimby, as a movement, remains unpopular in New York City: it may be politically protected; it may garner obvious puff pieces from big press; but it struggles to attract much grassroots traction as many New Yorkers remain wary of a group of arrogant, condescending eye-rollers, who publicly infer to private jokes while struggling to connect with anyone outside their tight, mocking clique.

Housing is tapas to them: they move every year, tasting new apartments, trying on new neighborhoods, a living game of SimCity which can only be played by individuals making enough disposable income to crib-hop. Aka, not how the other 70% of us NYCers live.

And I have been calling out that inability to connect for years now: yimby doesn’t partner well; they don’t get their boots on the ground in any meaningful way, sticking mostly to their own closed meetings and whenever they do dare to show up for live, in-person public engagement with other humans, they are sorely outnumbered and jeered.

Because New York City can always smell insincere opportunism: we shudder at fake smiles; we know a scam from ten blocks away; we’re not dumb. We know when we are being excluded and when we are being played: a braggart’s pyrrhic victory does not win us over.

But whaddo I know? I’m dead.

So dance it up with my casket on your narrow shoulders, boys: no fuelgrannie in your backyard.

I’ll be here instead: in real life.

“On This Day, We Are All Fuelgrandchildren😤🍼😩”

News of the suspension of my Twitter accounts @fuelgrannie and @QueensStomp gassed up the Twittersphere yesterday, prompting not only the name fuelgrannie to trend (continuing into today, even) but also sprouted a new parody alt, the slyly monikered @fueIgrannie (“the ‘L’ is ~*secretly*~ an upper case ‘i,’ bruh!!!”), a peppery complement to the already existing saliferous parody @gruelfannie.

Relief and delight upzoned the spirits of density bros and their few fellow avocadgals: fuelimination got uninformed boyfriends talking, created bright revelry in a dark Omicron world and hatched Fuelkanda forever as a tender memorial to the demise of my presence on Twitter.

Memes about worshipping at the church of fuelgrannie just might go to my head and the curious support of folks who hate me and had blocked me years ago is coconut-pecan icing on a German chocolate cake.

Yimbys are understandably concerned about the social media censoring of sarcasm: after all, salty, spicy, sarcastic takes stack on top of each other as vertebrae to form the spine of yimby engagement: if my unwell, homophobic, whack job racist self can get banned for irony, well, then maybe we are all at risk for such consequences.

We’re all fuelgrannie now.

(Or is it fuelgrandchildren?)

But more yimbys than not still decry the whole “defend fuelgrannie” thing, with the more savvy ones obscuring my name so to discourage any topic trending; the most important result for them is that I have been banned and I need to stay off and away and silent. They had tried once before to permanently shut me up and hopefully this time it will ackshually stick.

Yet I’m not really silent, at present, not like I was the last time around. I wasn’t blogging much in 2019 and my name certainly never trended back then. I’ve had more traffic on this particular site in the past 48 hours than I had for most of last year and my relevance on Twitter oddly persists, despite the fact that my account is hidden and I am unable to engage.

So I’m not really gone, am I?

I mean, you’re reading me right now, aren’t you?

Fuelkanda forever, baby.

“Let’s Kill All the Old People Especially the Weirdos”

Whelp, it happened again.

My Twitter account has been suspended, once more, as it had been back in October 2019, but this time is different as Twitter has suspended both of my accounts, @fuelgrannie and @QueensStomp.

While it remains disconcerting not to have a voice on the Twitter platform, I still have a voice on this website, my own platform, so I am gratedful for this space and also appreciative of how much activity this site is getting today. My piece about my first suspension has received more views today alone that it did for the entire year of 2021.

Unlike in October 2019, when Twitter could not provide any direct explanation for why my account was suspended (a likely targeted, coordinated attack by New York City yimby group Open New York as I detailed in a blog post back then), it was my reply last night to an account I had never seen before which ended up resulting in my suspension.

The account, @Ya3il8200, had tweeted, “struggling to see the difference between this weirdo [me] and an owner class nimby boomer [University of Pennsylvania professor @ValerieRoss14] who thinks nothing needs to change because they were able to buy their house for $50,000 back in the jurassic era,” and I responded with, “you’re right, janice: let’s kill all the old people especially the weirdos” to point out this account’s ageism, one of the more consistent themes in yimby engagement.

This was not a call to kill old people like me or weirdos like me: this was no physical threat but rather was a challenge to the inappropriate use of the “nimby boomer” and “jurassic era,” phrases which reflect the discrimination, intolerance and underlying violence against older people which I so often receive. I have been told to “not wake up” and to “get the bullet” on Twitter along with countless calls over the years for me to “take” my “medication,” “change” my “diapers” and “take a nap,” as efforts to silence my words and diminish my voice and personhood.

I am disappointed that Twitter could not discern the nuance of my reply or perceive the ageism which persisted in @Ya3il8200’s subsequent retort, “I promise you will get over the loss of the parking lot where that scoundrel Richard ‘Dick’ Rogers fingerblasted you after your senior prom in 1957.”

My school did not hold proms, nor was it attended by boys, so poor ol Dick Rogers, an imaginary person in @Ya3il8200’s mind, really missed out.

I’ve submitted appeals for the suspension of each of my Twitter accounts and I look forward to resolving this issue in a fair and reasonable manner as my engagement did not warrant a suspension.

So here’s to keeping the old people alive and vocal in this effort to stand up to abusive yimbys. This jurassic-era weirdo will always fight for my voice: as long as my old, wrinkled, redundant body has air in my saggy, well worn lungs, I’ll be keeping my mouth open.

No matter what the forum.

The Betrayal of SoHo NoHo by the New York Department of City Planning

(aka, why NYC needs you, elected NYC Councilmembers, to send this “plan” back to the drawing board for a more thoughtfully developed proposal which guarantees truly affordable housing and will also vigorously protect every unit of already existing, long-term, deeply affordable housing in all its forms which exists in Lower Manhattan.)

December 9, 2021

To the Members of the City Council of New York,

Please vote “no” on the Department of City Planning’s proposal to rezone SoHo NoHo and then please advise DCP to revise its purposefully vague plan to include, as top priority, specific protection against the displacement of over a thousand New Yorkers, many elderly, who reside in Lower Manhattan’s already existing deeply affordable units. There are almost 700 such units in SoHo and NoHo in almost 200 still-viable structures which will be threatened with a rezoning: we must protect these vulnerable New Yorkers above all.

As a former stabilized renter in SoHo and as a lifelong New York City renter, I ask all of you for a nuanced consideration of this flawed rezoning proposal and to acknowledge New York City Planning failed on its pledged deliverables of the Envision SoHo NoHo plan and process. The DCP has not done its job with its rushed and remote ULURP process, its conditional exclusion of public input and its repeatedly expressed obvious bias for real estate development interests.

This gratuitous and ruinous rezoning is defiantly being held up by its proponents as an opportunity for “equity” and “housing justice,” but there is neither “justice” nor “equity” for the vulnerable, mostly elderly, renters of SoHo, NoHo and the adjoining areas of Chinatown and Lower Manhattan who will lose their homes because of the zoning adjustment.

There is also no justice for the middle-income property owners, the artists of SoHo and NoHo, who, after working with the City decades ago to devise a form of affordable homeownership in repurposed industrial spaces so to ultimately age in place, will now no longer be able to afford to pay property taxes on the units they fashioned with their own hands back in the 1970s. Why is there no special consideration for these New Yorkers? They deserve to stay in their homes: as a city, we owe this to any threatened resident but most especially to this population who literally developed a globally adored tourist destination and now our collective payment to these people is to kick them all out.

It is disturbing what will happen to these elderly NYC residents, who have long been productive and industrious citizens: it is cruel, dishonest and dystopian.

The Envision SoHo NoHo process did not invite many of these constituents yet did, oddly, heavily involve real estate development lobbying group Open New York from its inception: Open New York, a pro-development group which has bragged about being the architects of the SoHo NoHo rezoning were considered by DCP to be valuable stakeholders, despite the glaring fact that none of them live in the area and despite the fact that their interests are purely about new development, not about consideration of existing housing or the value of the lives and experiences of the tenants who live in them.

The DCP-led ULURP public engagement hearings were held via Zoom while a global pandemic raged; the first of these meetings was in October 2020. I had signed up to speak but was number 354 to have make such a request and was thus not called upon as the session was deliberately limited to two and half hours: 365 people had signed up to speak that evening and DCP allowed for less than 10% of them to have had any voice.

How is that legal, NYC Council Members? How is it legal, in any way, to limit public engagement during a (wait for it) public engagement session?

DCP assigned the role of rezoning Senior Planner to Sylvia Li who referred to both the residents and structures of SoHo NoHo as “relics,” often and readily admitted she did not understand loft laws or other Lower Manhattan anomalies while also displaying an uncomfortable favoritism towards real estate development lobbying group Open New York. The entire process was a sham: right in front of the eyes of the rest of us.

You are our elected representatives: DCP doesn’t listen to us, so please be our voice and send this inadequate rezoning back to the Planning drawing board; this is not a vote to stop all development, it is instead a demand for better development from DCP, not their current lazy effort as this thoughtless initiative which will solely benefit the worst type of developers and create the least affordable and barely livable housing.

Please vote “no.”

Thank you.

Dresdon’t: The Argument Against the SoHo NoHo Proposed Rezoning

(My spoken statement to the September 2, 2021 City Planning Commission’s hearing on the proposal to rezone SoHo NoHo)

My name is Connie Murray, I’m a lifelong New Yorker and a former SoHo resident.

I oppose the city’s plan to rezone SoHo NoHo as this proposal will likely not produce any affordable housing despite that very promise being this project’s top selling point of allegedly providing more opportunities to low-income New Yorkers. This rezoning will also eliminate tenant protections for over 1200 residents in over 600 buildings in their already existing deeply affordable homes. These are vulnerable, elderly and immigrant residents: they deserve to be considered in this process, they deserve to be protected and we all have a moral obligation to keep these folks in their homes.

As well, MIH affordable housing is not all that its name is cracked up to be. Recent “affordable housing” listings on NY Yimby reflect salary requirements above $80k for small studios and 1-bedroom units which rent for upwards of $3000 a month. These are not apartments for working class families: who are these developers really building for? They never create 3-bedroom units and via advertorials in real estate media, developers are even marketing their alleged affordable housing to households earning over $100k annually.

This rezoning’s proponents focus so heavily on this fallacy of its opposition being wealthy but in fact it’s the residents who are not wealthy and whose homes will be threatened who are here today, speaking out against this proposal. The very wealthy do not care, they can move, they have other homes, they have endless resources. It’s the residents without endless resources who are opposed to this plan, the people who are mostly elderly and mostly those who built these neighborhoods into what they are today. And now they are being shown the door out of this magical place they created with their own hands, money, sweat, love and tears. What a vicious betrayal by this city.

Adding to that betrayal is the false narrative promoted by Yimby zealots that these senior residents are members of the Ku Klux Klan and that their neighborhoods should be bombed like Dresden. Elderly residents have been bullied out of public engagement meetings because their pictures were taken and posted on social media so to shame them as alleged racists who no longer deserve to stay in their homes.

They do deserve to stay; they don’t deserve these lies. So let’s protect them.


Stabilized Fleece

This, sadly, is a real letter.

I sent it to my building management’s office, specifically my landlord’s daughter (maybe granddaughter?), two years ago in 2018. To protect the guilty, I changed the landlord family surname to GreedymcGreedballs.

This written record demonstrates what some of us New Yorkers deal with in some stabilized buildings: and no, thank you, we do not want to move. We love where we live, we live in those places for decades and it is not just about the cheap rent: it is also about the investment of time. And that investment of time also translates into hundreds of thousands of dollars over the decades.

I’ve lived in my home for almost 23 years and have spent close to $300,000 despite my rent being insanely low for New York City. However, I also receive no maintenance, little heat, sometimes no hot water and this past year, during the pandemic, I had one week without electricity and one week without both heat and hot water.

I advocate for cheap housing because I live in cheap housing and benefit from cheap housing. But my goal is to change how it is managed. Because what happens to my fellow tenants and me is deplorable.

And greedy greedy greedy.

November 1, 2018

Ms. GreedymcGreedballs,

Enclosed is my check payment for my home’s rent.

As tenants in our homes in the building your father Papa GreedymcGreedballs owns, we appreciate that the heat was finally turned on to a sufficient level this past weekend in the building. That consistent delivery of heat proves there is no issue with the boiler: the boiler works fine when it is actually turned on. The only “problem” with the boiler happens for your tenants when you turn it off and refuse to provide adequate heat. We strongly suspect this happens solely for the purpose of saving fuel costs for the landlord Papa GreedymcGreedballs; we suspect this because it happens every heat season with the same unbelievable, illogical and untrue excuses given every year.

The management office for this building consistently engages in verbal abusive towards some of its tenants which is not only morally reprehensible and exhausting to experience, it is also against the law. Laws against such abuse in landlord tenant relationships, and even in business transactions, were created to combat behavior you, and others like you, embrace: it is a shame that actions and attitudes such as yours exist, most professional people would not dare function on such a morally corrupt level, but city laws against your behavior allow for the recipients of your lies and intimidation to obtain leverage against such abuse. Such behavior is unprofessional, gratuitous and distracting at best. At worst, it is abuse. Abuse is against the law, whether you like it or not: it is against the law.

It is against the law to direct your tenants to move out of the building: you are not to tell anyone, me or any other tenant, that their home is not their home simply because Papa GreedymcGreedballs owns the building or that the tenants should move if they are “unhappy” due to the lack of heat, hot water, superintendent and other legally-required amenities which do not exist in this building. It recently came to my attention you actually lied to several tenants by telling them that heat season doesn’t start until November 1: you are breaking the law when you relay this; you are willfully lying.

It is against the law to refuse to provide 24-hour hot water ever: hot water, by New York City law, must be available 365/366 days a year, 24 hours a day. Period. No more excuses: no more boiler “parts” which you all are “waiting” to arrive by “snail mail” from “Ohio” or from “Scandinavia” or “Dubai.”  Are you kidding us? Do you think we’re all stupid? You’ve used this same, sorry excuse for half a decade now: every September and October, without fail, you all pull out the “missing part” card and milk it like crazy to avoid spending money on fuel. No one believes your obvious and clumsy lie. This is Queens, New York City: if there’s any “missing part” for the boiler, it’s a ten-minute car ride away with a three-minute purchase transaction. No one, including Housing Preservation Development, believes your absurd lies and you sound literally stupid and crooked when you (still) try using them.

No more last-minute posting of signs announcing no heat or hot water for consecutive weekends or for one weekend or for even one afternoon or hour. You are never to turn off that boiler ever again unless you rent a portable boiler. You will never withhold hot water from your tenants again and you will never exploit the tenants of this building again for the sole purpose of saving your own money: if you all have to utilize funds out of Papa GreedymcGreedballs’s own pocket to provide heat or hot water to this building, then that’s what you all will do. Papa GreedymcGreedballs just bought a nearby eleven-million-dollar mixed-use building last month: if he has $11,000,000 to spend on a building, one can logically assume he has enough capital to cover the fuel costs needed to provide legally required heat and hot water to his current tenants here. And if he doesn’t, maybe Papa GreedymcGreedballs needs to rethink how he runs his businesses: I am confident the City can help him with that brainstorming.

The building management staff become easily irritated when they are told they are breaking the law, as if the annoyance of being informed of their own illegal activity trumps the actual illegal activity they are committing. It’s part of the ploy which is used against your tenants: you scream at them, you hang up on them, you bark at them to move, you mock and criticize their “unhappiness” at the lack of heat or hot water and you also claim the tenants’ homes aren’t really their homes because they are renters. It is illegal to harass your tenants in such a manner and it is illegal to refuse to provide services. Tenants are home dwellers whether you like it or not: these rental apartments are, indeed and by law, our homes. It is disgusting to tell your tenants that their homes are not their homes: do not ever do that again to me or any other of your tenants. It is reprehensible how you speak to people: learn respect and give it to people who give you money on a regular basis. Your disrespect and abuse are not a fit for this building.

I found out last week that this building actually has a superintendent, someone other than the man who lives in one of the illegally-built rooms in our building’s basement. I was provided with this superintendent’s name and number from a fellow tenant who told me this individual is the “real” superintendent: I am curious as to why the building management office never supplied all its tenants with this man’s name and number. I was also told that the building management office has its “pets” in the building and that these “pets” are served immediately by your office and even treated with respect, unlike the way I and others are treated. It is illegal for you to provide preferential treatment to some tenants while refusing services to other tenants.

The HPD inspector who was in my home to follow up on the heat issues told me my apartment needed to be painted, as it never has been in over twenty years, and that my almost 21-year-old stove needed to be replaced for safety reasons.

I am also currently dealing with a cockroach issue in my kitchen and other areas of my home which I suspect is due to a leak in the wall between my kitchen and living room. I have been trying on my own and at my own expense to eradicate the bugs, but they persist and I may soon need help beyond my own means with this problem. As well, the hall closet outside my bathroom has a heavy unattached door which rests against the wall. Also, in my kitchen, there has been so much water damage that some of my shelves are swollen and deformed due to water saturation. The cabinets in my bathroom are similarly waterlogged; it is challenging to keep all the water-damaged areas clean and vermin-free.

Because I was informed years ago by the building management office that I would have to “go to court” in order to receive any legally required improvements, like a paint job or a new stove or a repaired closet door or exterminator services, I have either lived with inconvenience or have attempted to solve issues on my own. The HPD inspector affirmed I do not need to go to court and that I can contact 311 (“think of us as your super,” he said) for such repairs. This letter serves to inform you of these needed improvements: if you pretend to ignore them, I can resend this letter to you. These repairs are reasonable, legally appropriate and are the responsibility of Papa GreedymcGreedballs.

Any time I call your office, it is a legitimate request for help. I am not “lying” when I relay to you that we have no heat and/or no hot water. I am not bored and making a call as a ruse just to bother you: it is absurd and disgusting to accuse me of this. There is no goodwill on your end when I call your office: I am treated like garbage, I am told to “move,” I am told my home is not mine. I am forced to endure these barrages and many times, nothing ever even happens to amend the complaint. I then have to report you to 311 in order to get the heat turned on because you refuse to turn it on when I call you. You waste so much of my time, it’s like a fulltime job to document what you do, it’s exhausting and it is 100% because of your neglect that I have to take the steps I take. You have no idea what it is to live the way you expect your tenants to live: you enjoy a hot shower or bath every day of your life but you expect your tenants to go without that simple and legally-required basic service for two days every week, almost a third of the week. Just so Papa GreedymcGreedballs can save some money. It is disgusting, it is illegal and it is never happening in this building again.

The building management office staff have insulted me, hung up on me, mocked me and dismissed me. I’ve taken notes on every incident. I also write down every time the heat goes on and goes off: I keep track. There are years of my complaints to 311. My phone carrier has years of my calls into your office and years of texts pleading for heat: I have extensive records. I did that on purpose. And I “hate” talking to your office, too: I hate lies and liars and thieves. Hate them: hate talking to them. But if I have to suffer liars and suffer lying in order to continue to keeping track, then that is what I’ll do. I will do it and I won’t stop doing it until your illegal behavior stops. The latter will never stop, knowing the GreedymcGreedballs family, so I will continue to keep track of it all.

No matter what your office says to me, I am not moving, you’re not bullying out of my apartment which I have rented since 1998, I am not going anywhere: this is my home and you are legally required to keep it in livable condition.

I look forward to that actually happening.